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Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Melting your heart

Nanea is big on negotiations these days. Mostly it involves bed time, or "treats." Whenever she doesn't want to listen, we will take away a privledge, which at bedtime starts with a book. If all goes well in the routine she gets 2-3 stories, and 5 min of mommy lying down with her. So, if she doesn't listem, things get taken away 1 by 1.

So lately, she has been saying, "can I watch 1 more show? I don't want stories." Tonight she kept begging to stay up, and after negotiating giving up the stories, she finally said, "I don't want you to lie down with me, can I have another show?" Usually that is a deal breaker for her. She HAS to have me lie down with her. I was actually secretly excited that we may get to stop this part of our bedtime ritual, so after asking her repeatedly if she was sure she didn't want me at bedtime, I agreed to 1/2 a show.

Show over, she went upstairs, started her bath and I reminded her that I would not be lying down with her and asked if she knew why. She answered that it was because she got another show. Great! So far so good. Out of the bath, into jammies, and then it starts. "Just 1 book mommy??" Gentle reminder, explanation as to why. Then, "just 2 minutes, I want you to lie down with me for 2 minutes." More reminders and explanations. More pleading on her part. Both getting frustrated, Nanea completely breaking down into a tantrum, me getting mad and telling her to stop crying, not to get out of her bed and closing the door after saying I'd be back after taking a shower ONLY if she was quiet. I should have stuck to my guns and not gone in after my shower, but I'm a softie so went in her room. As I lay down after saying I was only staying for a minute, she said "Mommy, I'm sorry the way I acted." If that doesn't get you, I don't know what will. So, we had a little heart to heart about behavior and listening and all is well in the Allen household - for tonight!

alohab @ 12:01 AM
4 comments

Comments:
This is wonderful! And very similar to what I'm experiencing (although I don't usually get the reflection/apology at the end). These little negotiators. I don't know how many times a day I hear "5 more minutes".
# posted by Blogger Kristina : 3:02 AM
 
oh my god this is too much! such a smart, smart girl. i love it!
# posted by Blogger BKR : 6:40 AM
 
Oh boy, it starts. I just went through more negotiations with Kamaile last night - and she's sixteen! It never ends but no matter what they're our daughters and we love them. Wai
# posted by Anonymous Anonymous : 12:26 PM
 
she is too smart-- which i suppose is where the trouble starts!! the apology!! but hope it doesn't lead to the guilty conscious / pleaser personalities that mom and auntie suffer from...
# posted by Blogger maikib : 12:01 AM
 
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